Thursday, September 30, 2004
Losing my balance from hunger, I knew I should have saved some of the food before serving it to them. Sylvia's unexpected guests devoured everything I cooked.
It was Jim, her loser brother bringing the rest of his family. Lucy, his wife never stopped talking since they arrived. Their children, Rein and Paul immediately ran upstairs to call for their ratty cousin.
I just cleaned the house and these "guests" appeared at nine in the evening to whatever their intention is, I am yet to find out.
Father and Sylvia entertained them in the receiving area. I was asked to serve them more juice.
"..and we don't know where else to get the resources.. we barely make ends meet" said Lucy.
I didn't mean to overhear their conversations, but from the sound of it, Jem cannot pay a certain amount of money he borrowed from father. And his wife Lucy is pleading for another extension.
This kind of scene is not new to me. People would go here to borrow money, ask for goods or whatever donation. Giving them the impression that we, the people who live here is well off.
But I can say with my whole heart that I am willing to trade places with them if given a chance. Retreating back to my room, I placed one hand over my grumbling stomach. Opening my cupboards, hoping I saved some canned beans. Unfortunately, a gum is the only thing I found.
Munching like a goat, I went out through the back door. One of those usual nights, breezy. I sat down on the back porch and observed the night clouds float in the sky.
Then I noticed there in the woods, a small flicker of light.
Looks like the night camper is out there again.
Damn! I hate fighting this urging curiosity. I peeked through the window outside, people inside is still busy talking. Lucy is now crying. Sylvia is just rolling her eyes. Jem, the usual emotion-less human being, and father, who I think is ready to say "all right.. you may have your extension.."
Walking away from the mansion towards the woods, I looked back. Mary's room light is still on. She's still up studying I suppose.
Turning to walk a little further, my heart is beating fast, excited. For this moment, I believe the hungry sensation I experienced earlier has passed.
I can smell incense.
Posted at 03:25 pm by quill
Wednesday, October 06, 2004
Making my way through thick bushes, the scent of burning incense grows stronger and stronger. I also noticed that the air is growing thicker and thicker that its getting so difficult to breath.
I think I passed out or something because I woke up in the receiving area inside the mansion. I can't recall anything that happened. I checked the time and its already twelve midnight.
What am I doing here? I peered outside.
Visitors seem to be making their way in the garden. I don't recall having something like this tonight. So I stepped outside and tried to blend in the crowd. These are people I don't know. I wonder where the hell Sylvia met them.
Some looked so suspicious and most of them are wearing black. I walked a little further, and I didn't notice but the crowd gave way to a guest that had just arrived.
Long satin dress carefully wrapped around her body, it was her! The girl in my dreams!
Where am I?
People moved as if they don't see me. Could this be just a vision I'm having?
This is like a gathering for something I have no idea what.
Suddenly, a voice I am most familiar with thundered with so much force that it started raining. Everybody panicked and I found myself running with them. Although I don't know where to go, I found myself again in the woods near the circle of rocks.
Appearing behind me is Tiara.
"How long have you been here?" she asked.
"I just got here. I ran as fast as I can. The gathering is discovered by Blanca with black magic." Words flowing out of me as if I belong. And I just know her name like that
"What about the others? Where have they gone to?" said her.
"I don't know. But we have to be careful" I replied.
"I mostly don't want to lose you Cedrick, never leave me."
And with that, I felt the warmth of her lips on mine. I held her close to me. Tight in my arms. Then something hit me on my back.
I'm back on my bed. In my room. I sat up twitched with the sudden pain on my behind. I felt for the spot, nothing. But the pain is so vivid.. so is her kiss.
Posted at 03:06 pm by quill
Monday, October 11, 2004
The ceiling looks lower when I'm lying on my back. Tiara.
A name I fail to get over with..
I haven't been getting much sleep lately. I stay awake at night expecting another gathering outside the lawn. Although, indirectly, I know Sylvia knows something about what is happening. Her's is the voice that we heard before the crowd panicked. But why is she called Blanca
I got my pen and wrote what has happened so far. Folding the paper, I wrote on top of it: To anyone who knows, help me.
I placed it on my pocket and went out. It was noon and the sun's rays burns. I circled the mansion examining every corner of it.
This place has never been a home to me. I still feel indifferent about the everything.
My sister is still catching her breath when she got to where I am standing
"Why so home this early?"
"Its my examination week remember? Anyway, is there anything in the house that I can eat? I didn't take my lunch 'cos I hurried home. I know Sylvia won't be around until six this evening. I want to take advantage of the television."
"Lets go inside and eat lunch together"
In the middle of our meal, I heard the bell ring. By instinct, I got up hurriedly to see who it was. Stepping outside, I didn't see anyone.
The mailbox is slightly opened. I went to check it. A brown letter sized envelope! Sealed with a red wax and some strange markings, it was addressed to me. Me?!
"Who was it?" Mary called from inside the house.
"No one. Maybe it was the postman. I found a letter addressed to me!"
My curious sister hurried to where I am and bugged me to open the letter.
"Open it! Open it! Maybe this is another mystery for you to solve!" She said excitedly.
"Stop jumping up and down! Calm down will you?! Its just a letter."
"Just a letter sealed with wax with strange markings on it?! Nobody sends letters like that now! Now will you please open it so we'll know what it says?" She's now drooling over the idea that we are in some kind of twist.
Posted at 12:06 pm by quill
Wednesday, October 13, 2004
"..I listened intently for your heartbeat.. It was clear and vivid. My heart calls for your name over and over. When I close my eyes, your touch seemed almost real.. your kiss, my love, stays on my lips. I can't help but touch it with my fingers.. trying to recapture the moment. Your skin, few breaths away lingers in my head like wine riped in a hundred years. You've not changed a bit.. I still surrender in your arms..your grip..I've waited for this moment.."
With eyes wide open, I folded the letter back.
Mary, on the other hand shows a baffled expression on her face. Then she turned to me and gave me that there's-something-you're-not-telling-me look.
I was compelled to tell her what had happened the other night.
"So, you woke up in another dimension and kissed somebody huh?! And you left her with something she just can't get over with?!" A sly smile is now curving on the corner of her lips.
"Didn't you understand what she said? 'You've not changed a bit' were her words" I said.
"Meaning you two know have been going out that long huh?" Again giving me that suspicious look.
"I don't know! I mean, she looked strangely familiar but I just can't remember being with her or even meeting her this lifetime! I will give you precise answers now if I have an idea on what the hell is going on" Slight irritation is now blending with the tone of my voice.
"Okay, okay. But give me feedbacks on this one. I want to solve the mystery too you know" She gave me a wink and went back inside the house.
I lost my appetite so I went back straight to my room. Examining the letter more closely, it has no postage stamp or whatsoever! Hmm.. maybe this is just some prank by one of the neighbors.
Or, could this mean that what had happened that night is not a dream? I tried to remembering every detail..
Posted at 12:08 pm by quill
Wednesday, October 20, 2004
Men wearing hoods is clutching Tiara by her arms. I know it was her father's order. A well known man who's beliefs are all in accordance to what was written in a book.
Dropping everything I'm holding, I ran across the fields after the carriage carrying her. Two big men grabbed my shoulders and started pounding on me. The first hit me on my stomach. It was so hard that I was thrown off balance. Upon hitting the ground, another one kicked me again.
"Don Rodrigo wants you to stay away from his daughter. The next time you even try to get close to her or even communicate with her, we're going to kill you!" they threatened me.
"I love Tiara, and I know she loves me. Nothing can take that away! Even death!" said I.
"Fool! You don't know what you're saying!" And with that, they left me twitching with pain.
Don Rodrigo. A man of politics that time. He has many connections in every aspect. Behind his strong personality, he still leans on his wife, Doņa Zoila. A very timid but hardworking woman, managed to take care of her family. She used to work for the emperor until his mistress worked their way in his mind and got rid of her in his services.
What Don Rodrigo doesn't know, their resources is fast coming to an end. His loving wife keeps this from him to shield his pride.
Tiara, being the eldest of three daughters has to work in order to support her other siblings. This is how I got to know her more.
In my youth, I knew her for we attended the same church. I was part of the choir and she was a lector. This was until I heard her sing and my voice faltered and faded in the background. From then on, I hear her voice at the back of my heart.
The carriage is fading from my sight and I blocked out to nothingness.
Posted at 05:10 pm by quill
Tuesday, October 26, 2004
It wasn't long ago, I was a guest at the Guevarra manor. Running away from a place that was no longer a home to me, I turned to Tiara for comfort. She convinced her father, Don Rodrigo, to let me stay for a while.
Don Rodrigo, confident that his wife takes care of their resources, no longer works for his family. He just spends most of his time riding his horse, drinking wine, and goes home late almost every night. Tiara was still studying that time.
My business, trade of goods in the market, was still doing good that time. I was helping Doņa Zoila make ends meet. I make sure that I don't eat food in their table without contributing something.
In everyday, my love for Tiara grows. In simple things, having less servants, I take note of her grace. Whenever our eyes would meet, she would stay on the gaze for a moment, make my heart stop, and look away. This made me grow more fond of her. I fancy her soft laugh.
Tiara my dearest,
It was not one of those nights. I was still up at two in the morning, spending the slow moving time watching from my window clouds cover and uncover the half moon. It ws grinning on me with billion star-like-eyes carefully casting spells. I remembered your face, absent-mindendly looking at the road as we went pass a long stretch of coast. It was near sunset and the skies started to bleed into orange to gray.
It was one of those moments that the beauty of sunset never fail to amaze me. You broke the ice with your smile as you pointed at the great fireball being engulfed by the open waters, the horizon reflects in your eyes. "Well this is one thing we have in common" I thought to myself. I was too nervous that my palms are sweating. I managed to gather enough courage to hold your hand. I saw you shift to shyness, I scrambled for a smile. I was lost for words that time because I was captivated by you than by the sunset. You returned my gaze but said nothing. You never did take your hand back. My heart was in extacy that it was pumping too hard and that my nose almost bled. But it didn't.
I can no longer contain my heart's desire for you. I lie awake at night in my quarters just listening to crickets, taunting me to whisper your name and take me to oblivion.. I'm in-love with you.
Posted at 12:01 pm by quill
Saturday, October 30, 2004
A figment of my imagination. I awoke still clutching the rake and with leaves bundled by my feet.
"Where is that lazy brother of yours?" a voice inside came booming like thunder.
The witch is looking for me again.
Returning the rake in the storage, I went inside to save my brother's neck.
"And who told you that you can watch television? Didn't I tell you to wipe the dusts off the shelves?" Sylvia angriliy said that her eyes almost jumped off their sockets.
"I am done doing those chores. I just sat behind Raphaelle while he was watching. I just took a little rest there" Vic said without blinking.
"And where have you been? I told you to monitor your brother while he's doing his job!" She turned on me now.
"I was at the garden raking dried leaves. I am preparing for the gathering that you're going to hold for father's birthday celebration." I reasoned out.
"Well, you should have gone in once in a while to check on him. He's too lazy. For that, I'm grounding you. No dinner for tonight."
I know it is one of those unfair judgement she makes but I let it pass. I know father will look for me at the dinner table later and I will have to excuse myself for having an upset stomach and pass dinner. I once attempted to blurt out that I was grounded and Sylvia just burst into tears and made another drama. After that incident, I was punished to sleep outside with the dogs.
Since then, I was treated more of a slave than a son of my father. Father played deaf and blind about all these for the hope that Sylvia will change one day and realize that love is strong and that she really is a good person inside.
I know she will never change.
I went back to my chores for the rest of the day and ignored the hunger I am feeling. I know tonight is not going to be one of those silent types. I don't know what I am expecting but something inside me knows something will come up again when the moon's rays hit my skin.
Posted at 07:46 pm by quill
Monday, November 08, 2004
It wasn't that long after I closed my eyes having to forget my hunger when the clouds cleared and the moon's rays entered my room and cast shadows on my wall. My senses were extra clear but I kept my eyes closed.
She entered my room. I felt her slender body beside me and her head slid into my arms. I smelled her skin so close that I took another deep breath.
"I wish I can tell father about you.. I just hate his beliefs and his narrow-mindedness!"
"Hush my dear. Let us not talk about things that will worry you. Someday, he will understand."
With that, I sealed her mouth with a kiss. A kiss that I will never get tired of. I held her closer to me. I feel weak and strong at the same time. I ran my fingers through her hair, held her face and looked into her eyes
We both looked at the direction where the sound came from. I peeked out the window. The rake leaning against the wall fell down.
"Somebody must have been watching us!"
Tiara whispered nervously.
"You better go back to your quarters before anything gets worse. I'll see who was it tomorrow morning"
I said sending her to the door.
"I love you no matter what Cedrick.. my Cedrick.."
Those were her last words that I remember.
Don Rodrigo's personal servant told him what he saw when he happened to be passing my quarters and heard Tiara's voice. Immediately, after Tiara had disappered from sight, two men entered my quarters and almost took all my breath of life from me. They threw me off a bridge and let the current of the river take me. They left me for dead.
I was in pain for days when I woke up on the shores of a land I barely know. I didn't know which hurt more, my injuries or my losing Tiara over an unfair fight.
The clock was ticking and the night appeared to be ending with the sight of orange horizons. I got up to touch my side. Why is that pain so vivid to me? Was I there?
Posted at 12:51 pm by quill
Friday, December 10, 2004
It was raining outside and I can smell the ground full of grass. I had to go out to make sure that the dogs are not getting wet. So, in the middle of the night, I was walking in the garden while rain was pouring hard. Giving the woods a quick glance, I thought I heard something move there. Although it might just be the rain or my being sleepy.
There wasn't anything tonight that requires much of me. The dogs are in proper condition and everything seem to be on their proper place. I went around the house for a quick check before returning to bed.
As I was entering back in the house, I heard footsteps yet again. This does not surprise me anymore. I hid in the shadows and expected something. It was Sylvia. She walks in the hallways this time of the night. It makes her look more creepy whenever there is thunder and lightning. I tried to silence my breathing so she won't know I am there.
She looked differently this time. Her hair is even more curlier (I know she hates her curly hair). She was wearing a long black skirt. Her nails seemed longer than the last time I saw them. What is she doing in the hallways anyway? She looked like she's under a spell. Normally, she hates lurking in the dark alone. A woman her size is easily frightened by small things.
She stopped. Stared blankly at a painting. Her hand moved through the surface of the canvass like a snake lurking around its prey. Suddenly, the ground shook a little. Like something made of rock opened. She walked like a zombie towards the guest room. There, the bed was moved aside and there was a stairway leading down into darkness. I kept my senses sharp for something that might leap behind me.
Going down the staircase, my heart was beating rapidly contemplating if I should follow her down. This might be a trap. Maybe she knows that I am following her. Then I heard voices. Chanting voices that I swear I heard before. These voices are coming from the walls of the mansion. Like the dead owning the place. Cold sweats on my forhead. Sylvia disappeared beneath the ground and my feet won't take me any further. I was forced to stay on that spot.
Posted at 06:04 am by quill